Why I Chose Thailand Needs More Explaining

A Question I Still Get Asked

I’ve spoken before about the motivations that led me to consider moving to another country. It wasn’t a decision made lightly. But even after making that huge life choice, the question many people still ask me is: “Why Thailand?” I don’t want to sound like I’m pitching a travel brochure or convincing anyone to move here, but I do want to share, with some depth, the reasons why Thailand of all places became my new home.

From “That’s Crazy” to “That’s Me”

I used to hear stories of people who’d sell everything, pack a couple of suitcases, and just relocate to some far-off country. Honestly, I thought those people were a bit mad. Free-spirited, sure—but also a little cray cray. I never imagined I’d be one of them. I thought I was stretching myself years ago when I moved my young family from the bustling city life of Sydney to the quieter, slower pace of regional Queensland. That alone felt like a major life overhaul at the time.

The Final Countdown

So, when the moment finally arrived and I was sitting in a hotel room just days before flying out of Australia for good—having sold almost all of my belongings, including my beloved motorcycle (which nearly stopped me from going, not even kidding)—I had more than a few “WTF are you doing, Ken?” moments. Some inner voices were less kind: “Ken, you’re a bloody idiot.” And even though I’d spent a lot of time in Thailand before, even had a Thai girlfriend, this time it felt completely different. It was daunting. It wasn’t like moving to a Western country like New Zealand, England, or the USA. No, Thailand is… foreign. Deeply, unmistakably foreign.

Beyond the Tourist Bubble

Tourists may not notice this at first glance. They’re often only exposed to the polished, curated, and commercial version of Thailand—the version that’s expertly designed to separate visitors from their money. But step outside the tourist bubble, and you quickly realize that Thailand is something else entirely. The culture, the values, the worldview—it’s all very distinct, even when compared to other Asian countries. The language alone is a beast (more on that later). If I had been trying to find a country where it would be difficult to truly fit in as a foreigner, I probably couldn’t have chosen a harder place than Thailand.

Real Friendliness vs. Polite Business

Let me sidebar for a second. Yes, Thai people have a well-earned reputation for being friendly—and they are. But there’s a difference between the friendly “nice” you get from people working in tourist areas and the genuine warmth you find elsewhere. In tourist zones, friendliness often comes with a goal: your money. People who seem chatty and kind during business hours may ignore you the moment they’re off the clock. In those areas, Thai locals often assume you’re just another passing tourist, even if you’re not. Earning their trust and showing you’re different takes time. In smaller towns especially, reputation matters. As a single foreign man, I’m very aware of the stereotype I automatically fall into. I make a point of being visibly different (not acting like most foreign men), respectful, and grounded in the community.

The Trip That Changed Everything

My first trip to Thailand was supposed to be three weeks. That turned into five, then seven, and eventually nine weeks. I remember the night before I had to leave. I was sitting alone in my room, and I started crying—deep, soul-level sadness. I wasn’t crying because something bad had happened. I was crying because I had to leave. I didn’t want to get on that plane the next day. It felt like I wasn’t leaving a place I’d visited—I was leaving a place where my soul felt at home. I hadn’t even left yet, but I was already homesick for Thailand.

When “Home” No Longer Feels Like Home

Back in Sydney, when I stepped back into my apartment of four years, it no longer felt like home. It was familiar, yes. My stuff was there, my memories, my routines. But it didn’t give me the peace it once had. It felt sterile. I thought the feeling would pass, but it didn’t. Over the next few years, I kept coming back to Thailand. Every time I arrived, stepping off the plane felt like taking a full breath of air after holding it for too long. Like I could finally breathe again.

Not the Usual Love Story

Here’s the thing: I didn’t fall in love with Thailand for the usual reasons. Not every man who comes here does so for the women, the nightlife, or the cheap cost of living. That’s not my story. What I fell in love with was the people. The culture. The sabai sabai way of life—easy-going, unhurried, and content. Everything I found increasingly frustrating in modern Australia, I found the opposite of here.

Choosing Happiness

In Australia, more and more people seemed consumed by what they lacked—always chasing, comparing, and complaining. In contrast, Thai people choose to be happy. They work to live, not live to work. They don’t measure their lives by possessions or what others have. Life is simpler in a deeply intentional way—not because Thailand is underdeveloped (it’s not), but because people here prioritise peace over pressure; calm over confrontation; respect over revulsion.

A Market Conversation I’ll Never Forget

One of the most eye-opening moments of my early travels happened during my first week in Phuket. I wandered into a local market—not one of those flashy tourist traps, but a real one with concrete floors and tin roofing. Every vendor was on their phone, no customers in sight. I stopped at a stall to look at some T-shirts, and the woman running it and I struck up a conversation. She mentioned she hadn’t had a single customer all day.

I told her how I’d fallen in love with Thai people because of their outlook on life. I said “you’ve had no customers but you’re still happy and smiling.” What she said to me next has never left my mind. She looked me in the eye and said, “Why would I let the bad energy of what I don’t have take away from my happiness now?”Wow.

That was no monk or philosopher. That was just a woman selling shirts in a quiet market. But that one sentence crystallised so much of what I’ve come to appreciate about Thai people and their approach to life.

Finding Joy in the Present

It’s not that Thai people don’t want more from life. They have dreams and aspirations like everyone else. But they don’t let the absence of what they want rob them of the joy of the present moment. It’s a kind of emotional resilience and contentment that I found both humbling and powerful.

Thailand and the West are as foreign as water is to oil. You see it in the people who live here. The majority don't even try to mix. others, it's like a globby mess of water and oil together. Very few can take thai beliefs and internalise them. Add to that, I'm not sure we re ever truly accpeted by locals.

Australia: Then and Now

Now, let me be clear—I love Australia. I served in the army because I believed in protecting it. But I no longer feel aligned with the people it's producing. The qualities that made Australia special—mateship, courtesy, mutual respect—are slipping away. Arrogance, entitlement, and ego seem to be taking their place. People wear their egos like armor, ready to fight at the smallest provocation. Authenticity is rare. Aggression is extremely common.

A Culture of Discontent and Addiction to Unhappiness

In Australia, people seem addicted to unhappiness. It’s become a culture of discontent—obsessing over what they don’t have and what they think they deserve. It’s easier to complain than to change. Everyone wears a mask. And if you challenge that mask? Watch out.

To me, humility, reservedness, and mutual respect are critical factors to life. These qualities however are at odds with the "ego" that it seems most people in Australia want to live out of.

The Boiling Frog

There’s a metaphor I often come back to—the one about the frog in boiling water. They say a frog won’t jump out if the water heats up gradually. Now, that’s not scientifically accurate, a frog will in fact jump out of water when it gets too hot, but it’s a damn good metaphor. In my case, I was the frog. I didn’t realize how uncomfortable and unhappy I was in Australia until I experienced something different. My first trip to Thailand was like being lifted out of the pot. Only then did I realise just how hot and intolerable the water had gotten.

Coping Isn’t Living

A lot of people stay stuck in lives that make them miserable. Whether it’s a job, a relationship, or a location, they try to “cope” rather than change. Their “coping” then makes them more and more unhappy. My coping mechanism back in Australia was to withdraw. I stopped engaging with people. It kept my peace, but it didn’t solve anything. I had acquaintances but no friends. I just didn’t have the energy to deal with the ego, aggression, or inauthenticity anymore.

Hitting Reset

Coming to Thailand was like hitting reset. The things I found exhausting in Australia are rare here. The honesty, the simplicity, the calm—these are the traits that resonate with me. Ironically, they’re traits I remember Australia having when I was young.

My Circle Looks Different Now

I don’t have many foreign friends here. Most of the expats I meet bring their mental baggage and western beliefs with them, or they’re here for the bars and the girls. That’s not my scene. I gravitate toward Thai people—not the ones working in tourist areas, but the everyday locals. And yes, building those relationships takes time. Thai culture is subtle and layered. If you’re willing to learn, adapt, and respect it, it will welcome you, eventually. But don’t expect it to bend for you. Thai people will always be polite, until the point they cut you off. You’re in their country, respect them.

I'm always amazed by foreigners who choose to live in thailand but only want to connect and socialise with other foreigners. Theyre here becasue it's cheaper to live, not because they have a love of thailand. It could be any country.

It’s Not Always Easy—But It’s Worth It

Living here isn’t always easy. The culture can be confusing. Thai people react to things in ways that are unpredictable from a Western perspective. But once you start to understand the “why” behind their actions, it’s easier to be patient. Easier to appreciate. Easier to breathe.

Breathing Again

And honestly? Since living here and embracing even a little of the Thai way of life, my blood pressure has dropped, both literally and metaphorically. There’s less ego. Less noise. More grace. More peace. Thai people aren’t out to hurt you, prove anything, or inflate their sense of self. They just live. And in doing so, they’ve helped me learn to live again too.

The most stressful part of my day is if I interact with other foreigners. It makes me crave the comany of Thai people.

Not a Sales Pitch—Just My Truth

So no, this isn’t a sales pitch for Thailand. Quite the opposite—I’m not trying to invite more people like the ones I left behind to follow me here. But I will say this: For someone who needed healing, simplicity, and a return to authenticity, Thailand wasn’t just a place to live.It became the place where I felt alive.