THE THREE AGES OF A MAN
We are not cast in stone the day we a born. Neither are we encased in marble as adults, compelled to stop growing and evolving as a person.
Men, however, reach an age where the difference between the expectations they feel, which are placed on him from the outside, are at odds with what he feels inside and what he expects for himself. The greater the difference between these two states the greater the feelings of unhappiness. These are the times a middle-aged man will lash out and do something for himself, then be accused of having a "Mid-Life Crisis".
All of us live in a psychological prison defined by others. A prison we can’t see or touch, but it places boundaries on all our behaviours and thoughts, even who we are as a person. A prison built and defined around us from birth, by others. From birth, we are told what to think, what to believe, and what to do. As we get older and move out into the world taking the “lessons” we have learnt to which are added “lessons” from society about what is expected, where we are supposed to fit in the world, what our responsibilities are, even who we are as a person. While we cannot abdicate certain personal, family and societal responsibilities, these responsibilities don't define us as a person. There is a balance to be had that most seldom find. Men of middle-age suffer the consequences of this and fuel that behaviour that others point to as a “Mid-life Crisis”. To him he has simply dared to take control and done what he truly wanted to, for once. The challenge for a man is to take control of his life and avoid destructive behaviours.
There are 3 distinct stages or as we call them "ages" to a man's life. These are the First, Second and Third Ages of a Man. Our aim is to assist all men in fully exploring the freedom and happiness available to them by reaching their Third Age. All men deserve the opportunity to fully explore their individuality, hopes, dreams, goals.
First Age of a Man
We Are Shaped
From birth until adolescence we are educated and shaped by others. What we think, believe, and know are all defined by our parents, teachers, and other adults of influence in our life. That is the way of a child. We are taught how to live, what to think, and what expectations are upon us by others. There is obviously no opportunity for self-determination. Not that there should be as a child however do the lessons taught to a child really serve us for the rest of our life, or do we serve the lessons?
Our character is shaped and our future life defined. Unless we make conscious choices these beliefs will continue for life. Some will serve us well, some not at all, and some will hurt us. However, we always have a choice.
We grow up within an invisible box bounded by beliefs and values tightly defined by the examples and lessons of others. Values and beliefs you will hold for the rest of your life.
Second Age of a Man
We Fulfill Our Duty
From adolescence, we move to our "Second Age". We are at a point in our life where we believe we are in control. We are oblivious to the fact we live our life greatly defined by what other people and society want and expect from us. Words like duty, responsibility, commitment. What we miss is that we are living our life based on other people's expectations, that we take on board and believe to be our own. For most men, they remain here for the rest of their life. Feeling increasingly torn with age between what's inside them that they want from life for themselves or questioning their life, made to feel guilty for wanting something for themselves out of life. Even our successes and happiness are defined by others
Our invisible box becomes our lifetime prison. It may be larger but more people think they have a right to define its shape and how big it is.
Third Age of a Man
We Fullfil Ourselves
The "Third Age of a Man" is when we realise we can be free to be truly self-deterministic. He can break free of the boundaries built around us by others. When we, make choices for ourselves. When we get to define, deep in our core, who we are, what we want and where we are going in life. We get to define what our life means.
Not all men will ever reach their "Third Age". There is no right or wrong in that. Some remain bound to their old beliefs, fooled by their ego that what they are doing with their life is of their own complete choosing. Convincing themselves they are truly happy and fulfilled as a man.
The way of the Third Age Man is freedom. Freedom to make your own choices. Free to define what it means to be the genuine you. Not destructively at the expense of everything you hold dear and has value in your life, but free to choose a balance where your personal happiness, the purpose for your life, and your dreams & desires carry importance. Where you are free to change beliefs that no longer serve you. Where who you are as a person isn't defined by what you do, what you were taught to believe, and what society expects of you.
This is a happy place. Importalty, not just happy for you. Our goal is to give the tools to not only make yourself happy but have those around you, your loved ones, benefit from you being your best self today.
We are allowed to ask ourselves, "who am I really", "what do I want from life" and "am I happy". Then to do something about it.
In our Third Age, we break out of the invisible prison and define our own life. To improve our own life and the lives of those we touch. You deserve to be truly happy, not just say you are.
"Live independent from the good opinion of others"